We can read books and listen to talks about how to maintain a calm mind, but these are only concepts. These teachings must be applied and explored. Important to note is that not all philosophies will resonate with us and we need not force solutions.
Spiritual teachings are transcribed and taught by humans. If we hear something and it doesn’t feel right to us then we trust our intuition. While this method may have worked for someone else, even many people, it doesn’t mean it will work for us. This doesn’t make us (or it) wrong. It simply means that at this point in time this is not the right approach for our level of consciousness.
Many people get injured when they follow an esteemed teacher. He or she may claim to know things and so we put them on a spiritual pedestal. We project onto them our wish to be saved, held, loved. It is a kind of transference that may seem justified because of their role in the community. But we give our power away when we engage in these relationships without verbalizing our intentions (or they theirs).
Calm mind is our natural state. If we are chasing the promise of it via the words or actions of another we must be cautious for our own sake. We must “err on the side of self,” as a wise woman once said. Not because we are selfish or self-centered but because we deserve to know and honor our own value. Because calm mind is our birthright. If we believe this is so then there is no need to request it of another. It is here, in this moment, for the taking.