When we think of a boundary, we think of a wall: solid, structured, impermeable. But some boundaries are porous and fluid. We might need to make use of them one day, and not at all the next.
If we’ve been injured we will identify more with the need for a hard, fixed wall. To keep the perpetrator out. To keep us safe. But to erect a boundary that is permanent means that we become inflexible, rigid. It means that we must adhere to strict rules and conform to a pre-determined identity. There is no room for change or transformation.
In self-help circles we talk a lot about the need for boundaries. I would agree that they are sometimes useful and necessary, particularly with people who may be unhealthy for us. But to allow space for opening in any relationship, we can consider the possibility that a boundary we once needed may no longer be necessary.
Healing can manifest both as a result of creating distance and moving in close to investigate. And these actions need not be mutually exclusive. They can even sometimes weave through each other like water reflecting sky. There is insight to be gained from lowering, when we are ready, the walls we have constructed. To step out from that container requires trust. But on the other side of that trust is a new landscape.