May 2017 | Page 2 of 4 | Sherisse Alvarez

Receiving Blessings

Blessings come to us through various avenues and in many shapes and sizes. When we clear a space in our mind and heart, blessings flow through our life and offer us a sense of peace and wellness.

One of the best things we can experience is sharing these blessings with other people. When we are in a place of abundance we need not worry that we will run out. We trust that all that is meant for us will come in its time.

Motivated by love we accept these gifts with an open heart. We know that hoarding them is unnecessary because we exist in an abundant universe. Embracing the symbol of the upturned palm, we become receptive. Receive with acceptance and gratitude.

Having had this experience of receptivity we can share our abundance with both friends and enemies. This does not mean we are naive, it simply means that we understand the roles of karma and grace. It allows us to forgive easily and move on with our work. We do not become preoccupied with the faults of others and do not become attached to what they can or cannot give us.

Our gifts come from a divine source. When we let go of the past, we are released from the grip of the material world. We elevate ourselves and start operating on a higher plane. It does not mean this awareness will be available to us at all times. But our intention is to stay connected to our essence. This frees our focus, allows us to be with and transcend suffering, makes us available to serve and be served.

Making Space for Sadness

We need not dismiss or rush through our sadness. We can honor these feelings, instead, by making space and creating safe containers. What this means is that we listen to what our body is telling us about what we need. If appropriate, we ask others for guidance but we trust that we know what is best for us.

Sadness can lead us to re-live past hurts and it may take some time to make sense of these experiences. We start where we are and try to take care of our basic well-being first. There will be an opportunity later for understanding; for today we simply focus on what our intuition is pointing to and we do our best to practice self-love.

If we tune in to our discomfort we may find ourselves wanting to take some action. Rather than act immediately we can stop to think about our expectations, and whether we’re hoping for a particular outcome. Considering a gentle approach keeps us from feeling overwhelmed and prevents further injury.

Making space for our sadness also means that we might have to set other things aside for the time being. We may find ourselves declining invitations or delaying change. Knowing that these choices are ours to make empowers us and fosters healing.

And if there is something we’re not sure about, we can trust that in time the clarity we’re seeking will emerge. The next right action will become available. Struggle will decrease. If we are patient with our own process, we will make wiser decisions based on our knowing. We will not be bogged down by fear and we will know that we are protected.

Ending Isolation

Shame loves isolation; it’s a place where we let ourselves be convinced of our “badness.” This myth quickly dissolves when we’re with people who respect us and when we’re able to express ourselves openly.

Somatic illness also depends on isolation and we notice that joyful states of mind will halt physical pain. There is now much research showing the healthy effects of positive interaction and the healing power of meaningful connection: with humans, nature, animals, art.

If we’re suffering we need not be alone though that is what our thoughts may be telling us we need. We can experiment with this if we have a tendency to isolate by exploring new ways of connecting socially. This may mean spending time with someone one-on-one or participating in a group activity.

If we struggle with the habit of isolation it may be something we learned early on from our family. They may have had their own reasons for behaving this way. These patterns no longer have to define us. We can take matters into our own hands and craft something entirely new.

Ending isolation is really about re-discovering our own humanity, taking risks. This change begins in our mind and can start with a simple question: What’s one thing I can do differently today to increase my happiness? Write it down, tell another person, follow through.

Pinecone in the Palm

There are many tools we can use when dealing with stress or anxiety. One is to connect somatically with nature. This reaffirms that we are safe and aligned with something bigger than ourselves. It gives the natural world permission to support us.

Those of us who live in big cities often feel disconnected from nature since we seldom experience more than buildings, traffic and large crowds. We have become cut off. Though we may yearn for more peace and quiet we may not be able to access it.

One way to reconnect with nature is simply to spend time with found objects from natural environments: flowers, shells, stones, twigs, pinecones. When we do this intentionally we find that it soothes the nervous system and creates a felt sense of ease.

When faced with any intense urban experience, we can bring one of these objects with us. We can also place these on an altar, vision board, or god box. Reminding us of our oneness with the earth, these objects support our innate wisdom and harmony with all things.

Awakening the Shadow

On the other side of positive intention is its opposite, its shadow. The more we repress this part, the more strongly it manifests in our relationships and daily interactions. Acknowledging that an element of shadow powers our choices liberates us from feeling shame. We are human and we must engage both with light and darkness. There is nothing essentially wrong, for instance, with having judgmental thoughts; the issue is really what we choose to do with these thoughts. Ignoring them doesn’t work, neither does giving them full rein. We must find a balanced approach. Both embracing and detaching. This may seem like a paradox but it is possible, particularly in various forms of meditation. Because we can imagine that thoughts are like passing clouds, we understand that they change all the time. From moment to moment there is transformation. The human mind is the same way. Recognizing that nothing is fixed, we cling less to “good” and “bad.” In this neutral state, we accept that everything is fluid. We see that shadow has something to teach us, that it awakens in us something previously unseen and brings to life what was once secret.

Redefining Intimacy

Our intimacy is ours to shape. We decide its texture, its essence, how it manifests in our life. If something has occurred which makes us question our ability to trust, we may be in the process of redefining our relationship to intimacy.

Believing we will know what the next steps should be restores our faith in healing. Listening to our intuition about what we need allows us to practice appropriate self-care. This is the foundation of our health and well-being.

When we feel unsure or afraid, our bodies tense up and we may feel closed off to others and to love. Noticing this, we accept where we are on our journey without judgement. We simply observe our experience and ask to be guided in whatever way feels right to us.

Checking in with others about what intimacy means to us also facilitates our recovery. It lets others in in ways that are nurturing and safe. These connections serve as necessary anchors and aid us in reclaiming aspects of our identity that may have been affected by loss or trauma.

When This Reminds You of That

So often what we’re reacting to in the present is really a visceral response to something that happened in the past. These triggers are real but they’re not the actual reason for our unhappiness. What they give us, though, is an opportunity to examine the original cause and origin of the wound. They are worth looking at and spending time with because they offer glimpses into emotional states that elude us.

Stopping to look lets us become a witness; we take a step back from participating in order to get a better view. Contained inside of that pause is a deeper understanding of our patterns. Typically, these are old and ingrained behaviors that continue to injure us. They are unconscious reactions that we repeat over and over again in hopes of achieving a different result.

When we don’t get what we desire we keep manifesting situations that will let us continue to act out. It’s a cycle that leaves us feeling drained and disappointed. When faced with things that push our buttons, altering our approach allows us to be resilient, stay curious. We also harm less and love more.

Daily Living, Devotion, and Grace

To start each day with the question in our mind: What does this day want to be? And to follow our inner wisdom. This takes discipline and practice. When we find that easeful communication with Self, we fall in love with universal flow. We begin to understand that grace is an experience to be embodied, to enter into somatically. What this gives us is an ability to both receive and be received; its energy is both feminine and masculine.

When we meet this flow, we also learn that even the mundane activities of our day are infused with it. Preparing a meal, washing dishes, doing the laundry. It means that inspiration can be found at all times and in all things. Profound insight doesn’t only enter when we’re searching for it; it’s ever-present. The fluid poetry of beingness.

And what interrupts this is our own mind, our own discursive thought process. We can, at any moment, be either in bliss or fear. In acceptance or aversion. It is up to us. And when we don’t achieve states of wellness, we are allowed to start over, begin again. We get to pause and invite in breath, light, the divine.

Knowing this gives us power and autonomy. It connects us with the essence of our life, and the interrelatedness of all things. Magic is everywhere and it is ours to experience. Each day we can ask for it to be revealed. All we have to do is be willing. It makes us humble to ask, opens our heart in a tender and new way. It restores us and makes us devotees, gives us fresh eyes with which to see the world.

The Things We Say We Are

We generally feel comfortable saying what we do for money. I am an accountant. I am a dentist. I am an architect. But we aren’t always able to articulate what we do for love. I am a painter, a writer, a musician.

It’s harder, typically, to speak from that place of soul. We save that for moments of intimacy with dear friends or a lover but, in our day-to-day, we tend to keep those parts hidden. We believe it is unsafe to reveal them.

The problem with this is that we can’t fully embrace our passionate self if we’re constantly censoring it. We have to invite it out from hiding, engage it, tell it that it’s welcome.

What starts to happen is that by embracing our whole being, the universe mirrors our truth back to us. We begin to embody the abundance that is possible. We follow our calling because we trust it is a pursuit worth sharing.

Dancing with Vulnerability

The best coaching happens when we let our intuition guide us. And sometimes our intuition will guide us into rooms we don’t necessarily know how to enter or exit. We’ll find ourselves in the in-between space, in the hallway, and we’ll come up against our own uncertainty. This doesn’t mean our intuition tricked or misled us. It simply means that we make space for the unfamiliar. We meet the moment with embodied inquiry and awareness. We pause, allow silence to stretch us. And we give the other permission to take their time. We have extended an invitation and it may take some reorientation before the next insight or shift occurs. There is no rush. Learning to drop expectation means that we engage in a dance with vulnerability, and we give the sacred other permission to do the same.